Saturday, September 11, 2010

Survival Instinct, Residents React

The Cabinet on Thursday approved the demolition of old worn-out council houses to pave way for low-cost high-rise buildings complete with modern health facilities, schools, and multi-storey parking facilities.

The announcement triggered a stir among residents of the estates to be affected as fast as it had reached them. Some residents saw this as a government’s scheme to rid them of their strategically placed homes private developers have been eyeing for a while.

A dispatch from the Presidential press Service which sought to placate the residents by saying that the operation will be done while safeguarding the rights of existing tenants has barely been successful.

Residents of Shauri Moyo, Kaloleni, Makongeni, Jericho, Maringo, Bahati, and Mbotela estates that have been earmarked for demolition insist that the project is not meant to benefit them but some rich people who will be able to pay the expensive rental fees.

Said Jackline Atieno, who has known no other home apart from Makongeni: “Uongo tu, hizo keja zitapatianwa kwa masonko (It is a lie those houses shall be given to the rich).

Demolition of Shauri Moyo was given a nod in the beginning of last year by City council big shots as a pilot project and even some of the residents confirm having been issued with eviction notices.

Members of the public described the initiative as “long overdue” but expressed fears the welfare of the poor residents might be overlooked. The resultant modern units, they said, may end up not benefit the largely poor residents but those with connections and deeper pockets.

A similar project in Kibera produced mixed reactions from the slum dwellers. While some were excited to move in to houses that were once beyond their wildest dreams others saw the whole thing as a government hoax to snare them out of their shanties and leave them homeless. They were particularly suspicious of the government’s directive to demolish their shanties as they left. They also feared that the government would soon raise the rental charges from the Ksh1000 they had set as soon as they had occupied the houses.

Such fears seem to be gaining ground in the current initiative despite the government’s assurances to the contrary.

It will be interesting to see how the government fights this brewing feeling of defiance.

Thursday, September 9, 2010

Kenyan Won't Win, Why Watch TPF?

A Kenyan won't win TPF4. A participant from either Tanzania or debutant Southern Sudan will. 

Tusker Project Fame (TPF), a Reality TV show aired every Sunday on Citizen TV,  is more of a publicity platform by East Africa's Breweries Limited (EABL)to market their products than a social social responsibility initiative aimed at discovering and rewarding untapped talents.

After a period of seven weeks the participant who sings and performs exceptionally well and wades through the house politics with care and diligence is supposed to emerge the winner.

Past participants have been selected from four of East Africa's countries of Kenya, Rwanda, Tanzania and Uganda in which EABL has been either fully operational or has been keen on exploiting its market.

As a marketing strategy, EABL strives to maintain its current customers even as it appeases its potential ones by downplaying any perception that they may be biased towards or against a participant country. Any hint of bias,the Brewers know, can be counter-productive to their business goals.

Unfortunately, in their bid to cut across all the participating countries, the organizers of the show have left behind a trail of winning trend that speaks volumes. Though it has been affirmative at best it has been absurd at worst. This streak has at times been achieved at the expense of talent and brilliance.

Kenya won first, Uganda followed, and then Rwanda-then new entrants-won third.

However, most people would rather than miss an episode of this drama-riddled show expecting to see soap-opera-like drama unfold as they also feel the thrill of unpredictability.

While it is true fanatics of TPF may be entertained to Hemedi's plastic libido-display as he chases after every other funky girl in the house it would be foolhardy to expect the curtains of TPF to wind down in a similar fashion. Ultimately,  there is nothing really unpredictable about TPF.
 
Based on the winning trend it is apparent that a Kenyan, Rwandan, or Ugandan won't win TPF4.

Nothing explains this better than EABL's "pan-African expansion strategy" and the near boiling point battles it has been waging against the South African Breweries (SAB) for the control and dominance of the Eastern and Central African market.

Kenya is EABL's fortress, according to EABL's Group CEO Gerald Mahinda. It contributes about 70 percent of EABL's profits with beer accounting for 80% and spirits 11%.

EABL doesn't need to appease Kenya just as Raila Odinga doesn't need to campaign in Luo Nyanza. May be the the inclusion of Kenyans in the show since when Valerie Kimani won it in 2006 has been nothing but a formality.

Instead, EABL needs to cement its authority in the neighboring countries where SAB is giving it a run for its money. This is more so in the virgin markets of Burundi, DRC Congo, Ethiopia, Eritrea, Somali, and most important Southern Sudan.

EABL's war with SAB in Uganda has been intense, may be more than any other country. Especially after the latter announced plans to invest sh 1.2 billion in a malting plant to process locally grown barley. This intense competition must have prompted EABL to naively award Uganda's Esther Nabaasta Mugizi this coveted booty of Kshs 5 million, a recording label with South Africa’s Gallo Records and a host of other goodies. 

In TPF3,  Rwanda in their debut appearance in the show, produced the winner. Soft-spoken, can't-harm a fly Alpha Rwiraagira from Rwanda won Tusker Project3. This was timely and strategical as it came at a time when EABL were about to make inroads in Rwanda.

This leaves Tanzania and Southern Sudan as the only countries to have participated in the show but never won. And with EABL having been granted the green light to own a good part of Serengeti Breweries and thus strengthening their hold on the Tanzanian market it should come as a surprised if the grand prize went to Southern Sudan.

Tanzanians would, of course, cry foul as they have been consistent right from the start when this show kicked off less than four years ago.

Any way, if recent developments are anything to go by, TPF4 must have been won the moment the auditions in Southern Sudan were completed.

EABL is keen on setting up a plant in Southern Sudan. It is reported that the company plans to build a 700, 000 hectoliter plant in Southern Sudan. This comes after SABMiller front-run them by opening a 2.9 billion plant Juba.

Said  Mahinda, "I can tell you that we are seriously setting up a plant there and everything is in the initial stages." It might as well be that giving the Sudanese the final laugh in TPF4 is part of the initial stages.

One thing is certain though: Kenya won't win the fourth Tusker Project Fame Contest and I won't be watching it.






Tuesday, September 7, 2010

How I wish Pastor Ojigbani would Come back!

For the just concluded weekend the place to be for all those still stuck in cold, lonely corner like me was at KICC.   Pastor Ojigbani, baptized "apostle of marriage," was in town. And as is his custom he was doing wonders. Performing miracles so that single independent  and powerful women ran into the arms of anything  in the proximity that came close to  being man.  How I missed the event!

The Pastor's presence, I am told, brought the house down. Even the combined influence of Kibaki and Raila would not have been as reverberating. And that is hardly all, unlike in the dull and rowdy crowd Kibera hoodlums in Kibaki's  and Raila's rallies, this one was fully packed with women. I am also being informed that the ratio of women to men in this expectant crowd was a whooping 500: 1!

And the women, I am told, pushed and shoved just to have a glimpse of this  man of God-never mind that he hails from the Home of  Philanderers. This Oga of the  Covenant Singles and Married Ministries made single and gorgeous girls to charge for a place in the already packed plenary hall at KICC just as the Biblical blind man insisted on seeing Jesus of Nazareth despite his blindness.

It was a wonderful place to be!

Those who finally got an opportunity to attend the seminar on "how to get married without delay" there and then began receiving marriage proposals. That was like the crunch time. And I can feel saliva dripping down from the sides of my mouth as I visualize that particular moment.

"Thank God we are finally there," I would have picked on a nice and petite girl, my hands on her wrist. And as the spirit took its toll I would have pushed them up to her chest and let them rest there for a while. Our eyes, of course closed in prayers, I would have continued, "It's been a long and windy journey, full of trials and tribulations but finally the Lord has brought us together." I would tell her that it has taken the intervention of gracious Lord to bring from afar land a Prophet to join us.  

Then I would go for the jugular vein, the most savoring moment. " Girl, would you marry me?"

She would whisper back, still possessed, "AMEN!"

And my lonely days would be over. But I am just dreaming.  How I wish Pastor Ojigbani would come back!

With Efficient Counties Kenyans Will Troop Back to Ocha

Remember the hit-song "Narudi Ocha"? The song was amusing as much as it was revealing. Released at a time when Kenya was hard-gripped by a severe economic crisis this popular hip-hop tune exhorted city-dwellers hard-pressed by the crisis to flee back  to their rural homes-ocha.

Unfortunately even ocha didn't offer any respite.  The country side was as dry as the city was hot.

But with the promulgation of the new constitution there may be some incentives for city wretches to march back to their ancestral homes in droves.  Should the county governments be well managed as envisioned by the new constitution then falling back to ocha is no longer going to be funny.

The counties are going to be miniature governments entrusted with the kind of responsibilities that since Kenya's independence in 1963 has been exclusively the central government's in Nairobi.

The county governments, in the words of veteran Kenyan journalist Kwamchetsi Makokha, are going to have exclusive power to run fisheries, crop and animal husbandry, livestock sale yards, county abattoirs, and to manage plant and animal diseases.

And that is not all. County governments are also going to run nurseries, polytechnics, home care centres and child care facilities. They are going to be in charge of licensing of such things as pets and sale of food to the public, water sanitation and a host of others.

Nairobi, for instance, is flooded with desperate job seekers. Most of them migrated from their rural homes in the hope of landing some greener pastures in Nairobi's plethora of  industries. Now they are being offered an opportunity to rejoin their families back in the country and work over there.

Narudi...ocha... ocha...narudi ocha ....still funny?